


Three Times A Lady

by angelsaves



Category: D.E.B.S. (2004), Leverage, The Avengers (2012), The Losers (2010)
Genre: Assassins & Hitmen, Blind Date, Board Games, Canon-Typical Violence, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Drinking Games, F/F, F/M, Podfic Available
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-06
Updated: 2012-05-06
Packaged: 2017-11-04 22:35:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/398956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsaves/pseuds/angelsaves
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha Romanov has done a lot of things in her life. Also, a lot of people. Three times Natasha loves 'em and leaves 'em, and one time she doesn't. Inspired by "Three Times a Lady," by Lionel Richie.</p><p>update: you can hear me read this in the <a href="http://halfamoon.livejournal.com/307398.html">awesome ladies podfic anthology III</a>!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Losers

Natasha has the bomb almost completely set up when she stops to think. It's in a big enough box that it'll look like someone is asleep when she tucks it under the covers, and it's set to trigger when someone pulls the blankets off. Her plan was to leave just enough time so he'd realize what happened before the little bungalow blew sky-high. His fault for trusting her.

She's not sentimental. They call her the Black Widow, for fuck's sake. It just seems like... bad sportsmanship, perhaps, not to give him a fighting chance. Clay's not very bright, sure, but he's handsome and talented -- is he _ever_ talented; his hands will be a regular feature in her spank bank for years to come -- and really, having him live to fear her could only be a good thing.

She puts an extra 30 seconds on the timer, and thinks of it as her gift to the next woman Clay lives to hook up with.


	2. Leverage

The short guy doesn't like guns. Okay; she can work with that. Natasha tosses her pistols to the side as a show of good faith, then arranges herself in a fighting stance and beckons him closer.

He fights well, she'll give him that. A little judo, a little Krav Maga -- he's been everywhere. But, then, so has she.

Eventually, they get to talking while they fight, and it turns out they're doing pretty much the same job, with pretty much the same amount of loyalty (i.e., none). Interesting.

Natasha gets him in a wristlock, fairly gently. "I'm bored," she says. "Want to have sex?"

"I'd rather play Scrabble," he says sarcastically.

"Fine," she says, and they stop at a store with board games on the way to his motel room.

The fucker knows _all_ the 2-letter words. The second round becomes a drinking game, and the third becomes strip-Scrabble, and then he agrees to let her search him for a cheating-at-Scrabble tattoo.

She doesn't find one, but it might be inside his eyelids.


	3. D.E.B.S.

This is ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. For one thing, Natasha is perfectly well capable of getting her own dates; for another, she is much too attractive for her blind date to be _standing her up_. 

She fluffs her hair and smiles charmingly around the café. If she can't have her own date, maybe she'll steal someone else's.

Just then, as Natasha is formulating a withering put-down to use if her date ever shows, someone drops into the seat opposite hers. "Sorry I'm late," she says. "You are Natasha, aren't you?"

"Yes," Natasha says. "And you're Lucy?" She's -- well. "Stunning" is the best word she can think of. Messy dark hair, strong jaw, beautiful smile. She'll do.

"That's me. Here, an apology." She tosses something onto the table with a _clink_.

Natasha picks it up: a diamond tennis bracelet, a good 5 carats at least. "It's lovely," she says, and locks eyes with Lucy. "Put it on me?"

Just as she'd hoped, eye-fucking makes Lucy a little clumsy; her fingers on Natasha's skin tingle pleasantly. "There," she says finally.

"I don't feel like coffee anymore. Shall we get out of here?" Natasha suggests. That gets her another brilliant smile.

Later that night, Natasha wakes up from dozing in the hotel room they'd rented to find a note tucked under the bracelet.

_That was fun. Maybe I'll see you around sometime. ~Lucy_

Not even a phone number. Damn it.


	4. Avengers

Clint doesn't want to play Scrabble or give her bracelets, and Natasha doesn't want to blow him up. He thinks there's more to her than what the Red Room put there.

She's not sure if she believes him, but if he'll keep looking at her like that, and touching her like that -- she'll try.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Three Times A Lady [podfic]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/696541) by [angelsaves](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsaves/pseuds/angelsaves)




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